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Post by Mansons2005 on May 16, 2015 17:54:51 GMT
My tendency toward sarcasm seems to be getting the better of me lately. I was at the clinic recently to met with my oncologist and my surgeon and had to endure the requisite visit with a Wellness Coordinator (or the Nosy Nelly as I call them).
As usual, she asked what I had eaten for breakfast. I replied that I had eaten what I have eaten almost every morning for the past twenty years - Bread and butter with coffee.
She immediately launched into a (seemingly well rehearsed)speech regarding Nutrition, bla bla, cold cereal, bla bla, eggs, bla bla, fresh fruit, bla bla and ended her tirade with the statement "At least have buttered toast in the morning"................
I allowed two beats to go by and responded "Do you suggest I put my bread in the toaster before or after I butter it?"
She accused me of being nasty.
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Fig
New Member
Posts: 42
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Post by Fig on May 17, 2015 18:03:43 GMT
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Post by Mansons2005 on Aug 18, 2015 0:30:15 GMT
I have faced and feared many medical procedures in the past, and my health has been rapidly declining, and I have managed to accept the "facts" and face them with a modicum of humor and dignity. But this one has me frightened witless. In theory is is just abdominal surgery to repair a hernia. Ha! Its one of the largest hernias some of the doctors have ever seen and three, yep, 3 surgeons have refused to perform the surgery as too dangerous. Complications? Oye, gevalt! Let us hereby enumerate the conditions that I suffer that may make this my swan song....................... One of the inoperable tumors is pressing on my vena cava and restricting the flow of blood from my lower extremities back to my heart. Causing slow, sluggish blood flow and swollen ankles and legs that itch like a Mother...........Result? Blood clots. BLOOD CLOTS! Yeah, an haemophiliac with BLOOD CLOTS! Some of those little pesky blood clots have lodged in my lungs. Soooooooooo, this hemophiliac has to take twice daily injections of lovanox blood thinner. And I can't take the blood thinners in tablet form because they are designed to more or less permanently thin the blood with regular use. Lovanox only thins the blood for a short period of time, thus stopping the use of it stops the thinning process. So I thin my blood twice a day, but have to be ready to go and get a transfusion of factor VIII for haemophilia A in the event I start bleeding.........Huh? So there is a surgical risk tossup - stroke, bleed to death or die of a pulmonary embolism............ Some of those tiny, but pesky blood clots have lodged in my lungs doing permanent damage before they dissolved...........causing a form of COPD. Yeah, its not the three quarters of a century of smoking three packets a day that is causing this new and frightening breathing experience - its all the fault of a 7cm tumor in my lower back affecting my legs, affecting my - oh, crap................. The hernia is so large and has torn so much muscle over my abdomen that the skin over the top is less than 2mm thick and prone to sores that will not fully heal, and the organs (intestines) have moved and jumbled about so much that they may not fit back in place during the surgery. The top layer of skin is so thin that any incision runs the risk of nicking or cutting a bowel at the start. And the interior muscle is so torn that it will require a number of cuts to the remaining muscle and the insertion of mesh panels to allow the surgeon to stretch the muscle back over the hernia. And while the plastic mesh used in these cases is seldom rejected by the body, it is not unknown and the way my luck has been running? ? So BOTH having part of my guts permanently "outside" my abdomen AND coming home with a stylish colostomy bag are real possibilities.................and of course there is the visual of pieces of rejected plastic needlepoint mesh shooting out of my body, tearing through my shirt, and hitting some well dressed but clueless matron in the eye.................... No one has yet determined what is causing the tingling sensations and numbness in my left thigh, arm and hand, which has gotten progressively worse. Oh, in one way it is a boon! Every third and forth self-injection is painless when is go for my left thigh or upper my left upper abdomen! So not knowing WHAT is causing the condition, they can not take precautions to prevent the surgery from complicating THAT as well..............it could result in more permanent disability.............. So as my (beloved - and I mean that!) oncologist has stated - We have three scenarios............ Death, Eternal Convalescence, or Eat a Chocolate Pudding Today and Get Your Ass Out of Bed Tomorrow and Go On Living.............. I'll take number three please...........................I like chocolate pudding - almost as much as I like living..............
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Pat
New Member
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Post by Pat on Aug 18, 2015 2:42:44 GMT
Oh, my... what a lot of yuck and discomfort to deal with. I fully support your taking number three... you deserve nothing less!
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Fig
New Member
Posts: 42
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Post by Fig on Aug 18, 2015 12:57:41 GMT
You may not see this for a while... and I hope that you do see it eventually. Now that I know what you are going through, possibly at the same time that I'm writing this, I'm amazed and heartened by your fortitude in getting through what you have borne up to now. And although your latest message was not fun or entertaining to read, I had to smile at the following. It shows that your wit is still intact. "...mesh shooting out of my body, tearing through my shirt, and hitting some well dressed but clueless matron in the eye...................." Wishing you well, and hoping that you will be back soon.
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loro-rico (aka Gila)
Guest
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Post by loro-rico (aka Gila) on Sept 22, 2015 20:59:06 GMT
I do realize and empathize with any and all frailties of any mortals such as me... God bless us all. On the lighter side, I myself try simply not to think of the thick black mustache that awaits me at menopause. XO
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Post by Mansons2005 on Sept 22, 2015 22:34:32 GMT
I do realize and empathize with any and all frailties of any mortals such as me... God bless us all. On the lighter side, I myself try simply not to think of the thick black mustache that awaits me at menopause. XO That mustache line made me laugh so hard that I was afraid that my incision would tear open!!!!
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Post by loro-rico on Sept 30, 2015 22:17:24 GMT
Just finished reading allllll of this material... wow! Are you famous? So many amazing people you've met. Astounding family history. Wow. And now you're trafficking with the likes of me. I think you have now pretty much done it all.
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Post by Mansons2005 on Oct 1, 2015 10:05:36 GMT
Am I famous? I WISH! But no, any claim to fame I have is very small and limited to my chosen field of academia. Others in the field might recognize my name, but that's it. My family name is widely recognized by many people in a historical context, and particularly by those who came of age in the 1930s-1960s, but not for GOOD reasons - thus my use of a pseudonym.
Yes, I have meet some amazing people, not all of whom were/are well known. Many of the people who have had an influence on my life would not be known outside of their immediate sphere - and they are just as important, if not more important, than the famous ones. And meeting NEW people has been the joy of my life, so consider yourself a donor to my joy!!!
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Post by Mansons2005 on Oct 7, 2015 7:23:39 GMT
Will this saga never end? NOW its the incision from the surgery that will not heal.........apparently there is a 3" diameter spot of the mesh they inserted that the skin will not grow over.......the mesh is visible and the longer it is exposed, the more chance there is of it failing................so I could soon have my guts exposed and poking through my tummy area............Gott im Himmel? Gottverdammt!
I am so tired of this ........................
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Post by loro-rico on Dec 1, 2015 23:52:32 GMT
Oh, my, well............... I'll tell you what *I* have to look forward to. A mustache that would put Pancho Villa to shame, that's what. How you doing, Manson? ?? XO, Gila
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Post by Mansons2005 on Apr 19, 2017 14:01:36 GMT
Ah, my new friend Mr. Morphine? He visits me in his 15mg Extended Release hat every 8 hours and his 15mg Quick Release hat every 4 hours for pain. The growths that they couldn't remove (inoperable because of location) are painful as they press against organs and muscles. At least I have a legit reason to tear up - as opposed to a "Subaru is Love" commercial. I also take 6 other pills on the average of every four hours to counteract the effects of Chemo-therepy, and not including the ones I take only once or twice a week. Which is the correct spelling - Junkie or Junky? On second thought, me and the pills and the stuff surrounding me in my home - BOTH spellings apply...............
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Post by uazoruqa on May 24, 2019 10:31:49 GMT
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Post by oceyugu on May 24, 2019 12:13:17 GMT
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